Truth

Hola people...Wassup at this late night???Aha...Me just finished watching this movie called 'The Last Kiss' at this whee hour but I guess I'm loving it so much and practically think that I've picked up something quite meaningful to myself...Oh well, no doubt that every movie has its own morale story and it just simply the way you seeing it that matters isn't it?Hmm...

So, whats about this movie that I've grown to love so much about...Well well well, its simply nothing more than just the TRUTH word itself...Yeah, thats right...A truth that you will ever gonna tell to yourself, truth to a relationship, truth to your friendship, truth to any of your love ones and many more =) Right, so how many times in life you're telling the truth in any of these cases; doesn't matter its for good or the bad situation? Well, I do know that sometimes we just try to walkaway from the fact or try to come up with some lousy excuses just in turns to get ourselves feel slight better than it supposed to be; yet truth is, we're not totally getting it over or done deal with it...So sadly as what it may sound, we're basically still stepping on the same ground if we don't try to accept the fact that it's happening...

Now thinking back over all these years, I've been living myself miserably and kept complaining about what I have, faced, lived or dealing with...I've never keep the truth to myself and started to take any possible excuses as a reason to recuperate from all the awful part of my life...Thats so a wrong move I've finally know by now...I feel much better living at the moment now than to keep dragging the past into now...

The word LOVE is what people often say but most of the time they don't actually mean it...Well perhaps it don't actually mean a thing as what you feel only matters to you but instead what you do to the people you say you loved, that actually matters the most and its the only thing that counts in terms of love...

Many occasions in life, you can't just try so hard to control it all as life is always gray in the most part and if you insists it always gonna be only the black and white, you are never gonna live happy just about anything...Doesn't matter how tough the situation gonna get, you've got to do what it takes to be happy with your current life and you can't just fail if you never give up on chances...No matter what decision you gonna make for yourself, talk the truth out...As painful as it is, don't be so quick to just walkaway from the problem...People know the truth and they may not like it or want to know about it but they always know...Lie and you will lose just anything you have or you could have lie and pretend nothing happened but isn't that telling the truth is far more important than knowing anything else?

Sometimes, if things doesn't work out the way you want it and you can't go back to how the things were before; why not try to start with something new and stay surprised over how the outcome is going to woo you? How can you not try and say that things are never gonna be alright or just live by with whatever that is it...Righttt?

Nite and have a nice sleep tonight =) hugs

Knocking all the way down

All of a sudden, emo starts striking me back these days and I just can't tell how much I'm missing my babe, TineTine Gan who is in KL now... Tonnes of hugs and kisses to my darling =)

Ney missing our Koala Bear Hugs

Lately, lots of the very 'wistful' thinking has been going on and on around my head and I'm kinda lost track of how to handle the situation already... Its been a while I'm getting this but now it seems like more thinking gets more hurting (Erm, I'm not sure how to exactly draft out this theory BUT it is how I'm actually feeling it right now) Sigh... Life is SICKENING when more and more dramas happened, don't you think so?

Buddy luncheon @ Jack's Place, OneUtama

Well... Afterall I still know life has to move on and on even theres a lot of stepping stones pilling up along the way to trip you down... Likewise or maybe its all another challenge to take, another path to walk across, another end breaching to a new begining...I know I'm always not alone to go through all these and I'm glad that YOU always care... Hugs tight tight... Night people =)

Tak LARAT

Jeez, I think I'm losing my 'ability' to crap and write non-sense here already =( I mean seriously, like when was the last time you see me post up something NOT related to an event or outing or a gathering or even just simply some food makan-makan post???

Sigh... From last year till now, the accumulated blog post are getting lesser and lesser by each month... What had happened to me actually??? Or is it that my life are THAT boring to even blog about something or what??? Damn... I'm hating it real bad to abandon this blog again and again but I just don't have the urge to keep on writing even though sometimes I typed out something but ended up not publishing it cause I just don't feel like completing the sentence or paragraph of words...

HELP~~~I want back my blogging urge, I want back my 'happening' life just like how I used to live when I was still studying in KL!!! Arghhh~~~

Happy Yippie Yay Yay Day

HOLA~~~*honk honk honk* NEY IS BACK, my blog is coming back ALIVE =) Hehehe...Sorry la peeps, I've been busying for the past few weeks because Bossy Phua Ah Chong had assigned too many projects to poor lil Phua Ah Ney =( Sigh...Working life really SUX big time!!! Shooh shooh...

Anyway, sad stories and emo feelings aside...Now I want to declare that today is officially a Happy Yippie Yay Yay Day for me and everyone =D Yes, you seen it right its TODAY 06/04/2009 ONLY =D Wheee... I am super happy, excited and hyper . psyched over what has been going on this whole day long...Seriously its my day today and I guess theres no word could best describe how I'm feeling deep inside now...Well, perhaps more smiley face icon like these =) X) =D XD explain??? LOL...Ok, this is so very the random sial =P

The clock is clicking and ticking...Counting down the days to my BIG burfday on the 9th April 2009 (THURSDAY) left only 3 more days and its only another 5 more days left till I reunite with my KL babes again =D Fwuahhh...Its damn '2 phats 2 fiuliot' (too fast . too furious) for me to handle it already =P

LETS COME PARTY PEOPLE YELL 'HEY...HAH...HEY...HAHHH!!!'

Hehehe...Sorry, I'm a bit off . abnormal today...Too much ohm for too many good stuff that had happened on me =) I *heart* today =* Muacks!!! Oh, not forgetting to make a dedication shout out here...

- HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIC'XUE GAN -

__________________________________________________________________

TIME . TIMING . TIME
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

For everything there is a season,
And a time for every matter under heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die;
A time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal;
A time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh;
A time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to throw away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
A time to embrace, And a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to seek, and a time to lose;
A time to keep, and a time to throw away;
A time to tear, and a time to sew;
A time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate,
A time for war, and a time for peace.

- MAKE LOVE, NOT WAR-
_______________________________________________________________________

Getting back on my feet

Fyuhhh...Wassup all the mid-nighties here in the blogsphere? Hope you guys are having a good time like I do...Aight =)

Hmm...Just finished watching the movie called THE WOMEN staring Meg Ryan, Anna Bening, Debra Messing, Eva Mendes and Jada Pinkett Smith =D Oh yeah, its all about the women this time!!! Hehehe...

So...Whats so great about this movie that keeps me watching all night long even its like freaking EARLY in the morning now *wink* Well, if you are thinking of another similar movie called the SEX AND THE CITY; I can tell you there is actually A LOT of differences between these two great ones =)
[The Women - 2008] talks about friendship, marriage and woman her ownself, which of all things - WHAT A WOMAN WANTS!!! Seriously, I'm loving the part where it shows how woman, at majority cases, can actually caught to be so selfish to other women, helpless when they are in the shoe and persistent when they finally came back to their senses in facing these three things at once =) Oh yeah, this is what we called the WOMEN *do'oh* Hehehe...

At times, women often got relates to the 'most complicated' human being by men but most of the time I find that they rather requires a lot of further explanation about those things they had in mind...Come'on, its the same that applies to both men and women...More often than not when a problem arise, either one of them will always jump into a conclusion of their own and then whats an assumption for that will then cause further conflict between two parties; thus, they started to blame each other for not being understanding =) Simple right?

But as far as I'm concern, no matter how bad a situation can go; we women MUST NOT keep the problems to ourself...Seriously, when the bad time comes, tonnes of irrelevant things can just happen without any reason to pull you down...And doesn't matter for the good or worst sake, share it with someone you know; be it a guy or girl BUT at least a trustworthy friend of yours =) Trust me, you could never feel any better than locking all the thoughts to your own tiny brain =P

Well, lately I kinda find myself tangled-up in these situations when depression starts to root into me...The feeling of JOBLESS sucks big time but no matter how motivated I keep myseld up to face one interview after another, I felt worst when all the hope I aimed for start crashing down...Sad to say but THIS IS LIFE people, learn to accept the cruel fact but never stop yourself from moving forward even when you are like stepping at one same point on the ground =) After all, always remember to keep asking yourself : WHAT DO I WANT???

Knowing what you want, moving towards the goal and thats the only choice to make life better...Be positive, be logical and be persistence while you walking towards it =) Everything gonna be alright cause Bob Marley sang - In every life we have some trouble, when you worry you make it double...Don't worry, be happy =)

Sending =HUGS= to all the bloggers out there whos having some tough time like I do...Cheer up, be happy BUT don't simply marry =P

Lost and losing

We took chances in life

At once and too many times we tried
As a child we thought
"Oh God, bless us for good"

Life is a gift yet its full of obstacles
Given and taken at turns
Our time just came too soon
And life was over in a flash

The fun we shared
The joy you brought
All just gonna remained as memory
Behind us, between us...

Realized and moved on

Teehee...I've got nothing to blog about actually =P But then again, for the sake of writing down something when deep thoughts start to roll in my mind...Its all good you know? Haha...Oh well, life has been boring again these day cause final project for design is kicking in...Oh no, here goes my sleepless night schedule coming next =(

Hmm...So, don't know what actually happened to me these days...I kind of came out realized a lot of things in my life...Things that once I was so stubborn to listen at other people's opinion and not to say that I even argued with them cause I thought it shouldn't be like how they said!!! Hmm...Stupid ain't it?

Well, I guess time is the prove of everything...You know, time pass and people change!!! I don't know? Maybe just the change of mind, change of attitude, change of whatsoever...But I guess after all this is not so god damn important cause we do have other better things to do, right? Then again, we must have to admit that the process of change IS...And rather its the most important part of everything!!!

I always believe : Things happened for good...It changed you to a better person, prepares you a better tomorrow and it definitely makes you stronger and tougher to face the threats of the outside world...I know how much I can handle and I hope to make no regrets in my life...Well, looking back at all the heart breaks, disappointments over disappointment and so as other awful let down things that eventually happened to me...I realized it really gave me a lot of courage and challenge to experience life that other people don't...Indeed, I have gone through way enough at this age of mine and I am really happy for myself to survive and get through all these shit by now...So, don't you dare judge me just enough from what you see...I could be just more than what you think I might be, so lets get our own life and move on...

Quotes from Linkin Park's [Leave Out All The Rest] to you -

I dreamed I was missing
You were so scared
But no one would listen
'Cause no one else care

After my dreaming
I woke with this fear
What am I leaving
When I am done here

So if you're asking me
I want you to know

When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

And don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory
Leave out all the rest, leave out all the rest

Don't be affraid
I've taken all my beating
I've shed but I'm me

I'm strong on the surface
Not all the way through
I've never been perfect
But neither have you

So if you're asking me
I want you to know

When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

And don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory
Leave out all the rest, leave out all the rest

Forgetting all the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well
Pretending someone else can come
And save me from myself
I can't be who you are

When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

And don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory
Leave out all the rest, leave out all the rest

Forgetting all the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well
Pretending someone else can come
And save me from myself
I can't be who you are
I can't be who you are

Giving up, waking up

I am feeling damn tired of all this...
I am feeling exhausted to keep putting back things together...
I am feeling so lost to not be myself again...
I am feeling hollow inside out...
BUT then and again,
I really had enough of what tortures my heart...
I don't know if I ever gonna make a good decision in this...
I don't know if I ever gonna regret 9 9 after this...
I don't know if I ever gonna change my mind and run after you...
I don't know what should I do really...
BUT what i do know is,
I don't see the same you had for me anymore...

Oh, come on...
Please do tell me that I am right to do all this...
Please do support my decision making...
Please do give me some respect of how I should live my life...
Please do keep quiet and shut up right there and then...

I want things to be over now...
I want giving up hope that 'us' will never gonna happen...
I want to live life happily and simple...
I want what I deserved to have...

____________________________________enough said

A letter to a friend

Hey...I am back!!! Sorry...Again for so many days since i last blogged, just feel like scribbling down something new right here today...Feeling a lil emo tonight~ Anyway, apart from being good and all (yeah, perasan sendiri...I know =P) I am still feeling sick ever since the very last week which I think I did mentioned about it at here before...Sigh, yes that I still having the bad bad cough and I am actually wondering when I am gonna get rid of it =(
Hmm...So, how should I start off to blog about this entry...Well, nothing really that important though...Just maybe some of the lil thoughts over true friendship kind of problem that I think until now I am still searching for an answer for it...Sigh, I am just being a typical me that is sensitive and 'aggresive' towards every single details that is happening in my life...I can never simply let things go, can I?
Been feeling a lil gap among us these days, don't know what actually went wrong but hopefully it shouldn't be something serious...Right? So, how are you feeling these days? What are you up to? Well, I guess these are those questions that I have been wanting to ask you face to face but I also thought maybe you might need some time to cool off your own problem that you are facing...Whats really bothering your mind my dear? From what I have been observing lately, you don't seems like you want to share out your problems with me anymore =( Why ah? Apa macam? Why are we standing so far apart from each other and yet we are actually so close to know about every single things that has happened in a day...It really make me feels like as if I am a few thousand miles away from you now...Sitting down and start thinking deep...I can barely recall anything that we actually talked over the night in anyone of these days after our very last bonding session...Have I been really annoyed or pain in the ass to you that now you don't even want to bring up anything at me anymore? I am terribly sorry if I have ever been one to you...
Hmm...Still remembered those day when we used to share every single stories and gossip with each other and believe it not, the thoughts of every single bits of it are still clearly fresh in my mind...Really missed those sweet old times we spent together...All the laughter and tears we shared!!! Hehe...
(p/s : Don't get me wrong in this cause I am pretty much straight straight 'terus lurus' and I am definitely not 'sengeted'...Hmm...)

For once and forever, I never really thought we could actually be that close as a friend...Its hard for me to actually find true friendship when most of the people I know around me are so politically influenced by the culture there...I am feeling so grateful to be one of yours and thankful for everything that put us through...Babe, remember no matter what I will always be here for you...To lend a hand, to borrow my shoulder, to listen with ears and hug with arms...Don't worry, I won't be stingy to you =p

When friendship undergo a test
It's often found that old friends are still the best
The sampler on the parlor wall
Has these few lines written which they say it all
The best of friends can change a frown
Into a smile when you're feeling down
The best of friends will understand
Your little trials and then she lend a hand
The best of friends will always share
Your secret dreams and fear because they care
The best of friends worth more than a gold
So give all the love and a heart can hold

Good Guys vs. Bad Guys

Haha...I know its just so out of randomness for me to bring up such topic today but believe me not, I am sure there is a lot of you out there gonna be nodding your head agreed to what I will be explaining later =D

So!!! Heres the fact that first of all I think each and everyone of you might have a lil different thoughts over the word L.O.V.E - to love or to be loved? Well, I personally believe that none of us have the will-power to choose which categories you want to or should fall in love with another and there is certainly no right or wrong for you to fall in love with someone whom you really care and definitely can't live without...Hmm, starting to sound a lil like the philosopher talking ady *tsk tsk*

ANYWAY...Speaking of such, I do find majority in our girls who would strongly agree with me that we girls often let the bad boys trample all over our heart while on the other hand, crushes the good ones under our heels yet still proclaimed and wondered 'Where have the good guys gone? Why BAD boys can make such GOOD boyfriends but GOOD boys sucks at being so!!! Aren't they both guys?' Hahaha...Ironic don't we?

Then and again, I do believe that there is always a truth of every woman that lies secretly underneath whenever she fall in love with someone...No matter who and how old the person is, they always want to fall in such a way that they are being helplessly abandoned, dizzying in the ride of highs and lows of heart-bursting happiness and so as those heart-breaking misery that will make them remember for life and definitely not forgetting every single bit of it...Yeah, you got me right!!! FALL DEEP DEEP!!! Hehe...

Undoubtedly, good guys will always be the rational choice or rather the logical option for girls when they grew older and tried to settle down for better future...When we girls finally made decision with our minds and reached by the rational thoughts, the good guys will win our physical beings but still not our hearts...Sadly and YES SADLY NOT OUR HEARTS!!! In spite, we girls often follow what our hearts tell us so and there goes the reason why we keep loving and falling for the bad guys while wishing it would be some passionate and adventurous love even though they will enslave us in becoming their servants that would pander to their every desires...

Keep bleeding, keep keep bleeding love~

So if ever come over to question between right and wrong in love matters, I would really be hard-pressed in deciding which would be which... Or rather saying for the better or worse!!! We all know BAD BOYS clearly make much better BOYFRIENDS but at the same time I would have to also admit and remind you girls that GOOD BOYS probably make better HUSBAND!!!

Haha...Feeling the love now? Hmm...I certainly have and heres the last verse for you who read till the very last part of this...Decide but don't regret!!! Peace out~